Having social anxiety can be one of the most damaging forms of anxiety disorder. This is because it has such a dramatic impact on the important relationships in your life. Social anxiety at work can affect your career opportunities.

Anxiety in public places, such as the airport or the local eatery, can impact your ability to meet new people and make friends. Most importantly, anxiety at special events, such as a party, romantic night out, or family vacation, can severely damage your bonds with the people who are most important to you.

The problem you have is very complex. Overcoming social anxiety disorder is not a simple task. Fortunately, it is not an impossible task either. While you will need to commit yourself to a proven anti-anxiety program to fully cure yourself, here are two important tips to help you get started.

Do Not Turn To Vices As Temporary Fix

Vices are a primary coping tool for a good portion of the population. People turn to vices for comfort and to momentarily forget their worries.

The problem is that you are only coping and it is only for a moment. Once you are done with your vice, your problems are likely to come back quickly and be more extreme.

Alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, and sweets are just a few of the many choices people turn to for comfort when their anxiety is beginning. The problem is that these harm you far more than they help you. You already know this. You know that these vices are bad for you.

They damage your body and they weaken your health. All of those fears that you have about your health failing during a panic attack are closer to becoming true each time you turn to your vice.

One of the most important points to remember about using vices is that they interfere with your frame of mind and control. The root of most anxiety is the fear of losing control. While you might temporarily feel better, you are handing over a good portion of your control.

The particular problem with using vices to cope with social anxiety is that they are most likely to be used in a social setting. You are more likely to drink, eat, or smoke when you are in a social atmosphere than when you are home in a place you feel safe. This means that you are handing over your control when you most need it.

Obviously, if you want to have the upper hand on your anxiety in a social situation, you have to stay away from the vices. Unfortunately, if you trying to figure out how to overcome social anxiety then you know you do not want to do anything to increase your anxiety.

Giving up vices can cause plenty of anxiety without the added pressure of being in a social setting without them.

To give up your vices without causing additional anxiety, you will probably have to seek the help of an expert. They will teach you the least stressful methods of freeing yourself from dependency while maintaining your calm.

In the meantime, there are several techniques you can use when you are in a social setting to help with your anxiety and shyness.

As A Diversion, Find An Interesting Hobby Or Book

Many social anxiety sufferers worry that they will not perform well in a social setting. If it is a casual setting, especially one that involves many strangers, they worry that they will feel inadequate.

The thought of feeling ignored, uninteresting, unintelligent, or being made fun of is too much to handle. You can preempt these feelings, and take a major step towards overcoming social anxiety and shyness, if you show up prepared.

This is where the tried and true tactic of diversion will greatly help you. Diversion is perhaps the number one tool used to maintain control over most forms of anxiety.

Whether it is exercise, meditation, or focusing on the important things in life there is typically a diversion option that is right for everyone. Activities that keep your mind focused on enjoyable and calming thoughts will help you keep your anxiety at bay.

When it comes to social anxiety, diversion techniques can play two beneficial roles. First, it gives you something to concentrate on when your anxiety begins to build. Secondly, if it is the right diversion it can give you all the ammunition you need to come out on top at a social gathering.

Start reading a really good book. Find one that thoroughly excites you and keeps your mind totally engaged. If not a book, find a new hobby that you are enthusiastic about. The more the hobby keeps your focus, the better.

The more interesting you find your diversion, the more you will be able to call upon those feelings to keep your control when you feel your anxiety building.

In addition to distracting you from your anxiety, the right diversion can mean the difference between feeling like an outcast or a success in a social setting. If you are very engaged in your chosen diversion, you will feel confident talking about it with others.

Meanwhile, you will be so concentrated on talking about your newfound enjoyment that you will not have time to think about your anxiety. People will pick up on your enthusiasm and reward you with positive reinforcement.

All of this will build your esteem and you will find yourself actually enjoying the social situation instead of running from it.

Now It Is Time To Commit To An Anti-Anxiety Program

As stated earlier, these are only initial techniques you can use to tame your anxiety. These techniques will help you function better in a social setting, but they are not your solution. If you truly want to overcome social anxiety, you will need to commit yourself to a complete and proven anti-anxiety program.

A great program to try is The Panic Puzzle Program. Written by an anxiety expert and used by many to cure anxiety, this program has a very informative section dedicated to the specific challenges of social anxiety and shyness. Additionally, you will learn tools to control anxiety in general and stop letting anxiety impact your relationships.

Do not let social anxiety keep you from the things you most want, including healthy relationships. If you can learn to overcome your social anxiety, you will be amazed how many doors it will open for you. If you employ these techniques and learn to treat your anxiety with a proven anti-anxiety regiment, you are going to feel happier and find greater enjoyment in life.

Does the thought of going to a social gathering throw you into an anxiety roller coaster leaping you into a full-blown panic attack? It can be a scary experience, always thinking what others are going to think of you.

Am I wearing the right outfit? Will they find me funny or interesting? What if I say the wrong thing? What if they hate me? Will I be able to make them happy? Will they accept me as one of their friends or will I be left alone on the sidelines like a wallflower as everyone else seems to have a great time? All these questions and thoughts can cause havoc not only on elevating your anxiety, but your self-confidence as well.

Here’s a few quick tips for conquering social gatherings:

1. Be Yourself, even if being yourself is goofy, geeky, or outspoken. If they don’t like the real you, why try to be someone else?
2. They are just as scare as you are. You may be scared to start a conversation with someone, but remember that they are probably as scared to start one as you are. Think about it for a moment… how do you feel when someone else starts the conversation? Good right? Than be the first mover and reach out and talk someones ear off!
3. If you don’t know what to talk about, ask questions! People love to talk about themselves. Start with questions that are easy for your new friend to answer. Like have they always lived in the city, how do they know the guest of honor, what do they do for a living, do they come here often…talk about the weather. When they respond — relate to them “oh you lived in Ottawa, I have an aunt who lives there”…than follow it with a question to tilt the conversation back towards them. People also love compliments — “hey those are cool shoes, did you get them downtown?”….”I love your hair, did you get it done at Mario’s”?. Your compliments should be genuine. If you really don’t like the persons shoes don;t say you do, or else they will sense your dishonesty.
4. Wear your best clothes. Anytime I went out where I was meeting people I did not know or barely knew, I always bought some new clothes or wore my favorite outfit. Good clothes has a magic effect on your self-confidence. If you feel sexy and confident, you’ll come off as sexy and confident. So, do yourself a favor and leave the teenage mutant ninja turtle jogging pants at home!

Don’t let your social anxiety stop you from becoming all that you can become.  Many times we become shy or worried about what others may think about us or our ideas, the reality is that all this fears are nothing more than illusions.  So, be proud of who you are — be confident in your abilities, and be the best YOU.