Does the thought of going to a social gathering throw you into an anxiety roller coaster leaping you into a full-blown panic attack? It can be a scary experience, always thinking what others are going to think of you.
Am I wearing the right outfit? Will they find me funny or interesting? What if I say the wrong thing? What if they hate me? Will I be able to make them happy? Will they accept me as one of their friends or will I be left alone on the sidelines like a wallflower as everyone else seems to have a great time? All these questions and thoughts can cause havoc not only on elevating your anxiety, but your self-confidence as well.
Here’s a few quick tips for conquering social gatherings:
- Be Yourself, even if being yourself is goofy, geeky, or outspoken. If they don’t like the real you, why try to be someone else?
- They are just as scare as you are. You may be scared to start a conversation with someone, but remember that they are probably as scared to start one as you are. Think about it for a moment… how do you feel when someone else starts the conversation? Good right? Than be the first mover and reach out and talk someones ear off!
- If you don’t know what to talk about, ask questions! People love to talk about themselves. Start with questions that are easy for your new friend to answer. Like have they always lived in the city, how do they know the guest of honor, what do they do for a living, do they come here often…talk about the weather. When they respond — relate to them “oh you lived in Ottawa, I have an aunt who lives there”…than follow it with a question to tilt the conversation back towards them. People also love compliments — “hey those are cool shoes, did you get them downtown?”….”I love your hair, did you get it done at Mario’s”?. Your compliments should be genuine. If you really don’t like the persons shoes don;t say you do, or else they will sense your dishonesty.
- Wear your best clothes. Anytime I went out where I was meeting people I did not know or barely knew, I always bought some new clothes or wore my favorite outfit. Good clothes has a magic effect on your self-confidence. If you feel sexy and confident, you’ll come off as sexy and confident. So, do yourself a favor and leave the teenage mutant ninja turtle jogging pants at home!
